Author Archive

20 years ago, UNAIDS organised the original World AIDS Day on the 1st of December. The theme in 1988 for World AIDS Day was communication. In 2005 UNAIDS handed over responsibility for World AIDS Day to an independent organisation known as World AIDS Campaign which can be found on www.worldaidscampaign.org. Some of my favourite themes include 1991 ‘Sharing the Challenge’ and 1996 ‘One World, One Hope’. This year, for a second time, the theme is ‘Leadership’. Communities and individuals are empowered to lead around access to prevention, treatment and knowing your rights to fight stigma and discrimination. Leadership also encourages governments to keep promises that have been made. (more…)

This year I had the opportunity to attend the 17th International AIDS Conference, which ran from the 3rd - 8th August in Mexico City. I was brought to tears early on in the conference, when a young 13 year old girl from Honduras, who has been living with HIV since she was born, described her desire to live a normal life without discrimination. A life where her blossoming sexuality was uncomplicated and she could pursue her life time dreams of being a singer. (more…)

‘See that guy over there. He has HIV and that one does too.’

The strategy of avoiding the risk of acquiring HIV by avoiding people with HIV may seem logical and sound from the perspective of someone who is HIV negative. This strategy even had some efficacy in the early days of the HIV epidemic when it was obvious that some people had compromised immune systems. (more…)

When reports in the media come out about a person with HIV knowingly infecting others, what thoughts pass through your mind? What is an appropriate response?

A question that is sometimes asked of me is: ‘How did you get HIV?’ To which I have often said, ‘through making love and having intimacy with another man’. I say it in this way to contextualise the experience. As a 21 year old I met a gorgeous man on a beach. We went back to his place and had a beautiful experience. I was so blissful that not even death could rob me now of my young life’s best experience ever. (more…)

There are many reasons why people seek out an HIV test. For some, HIV testing is part of their regular heath routine, while for others the beginning of a new relationship can be an impetus to get tested. Whatever the reason, waiting for an HIV test result can be stressful – particularly if you know that you have placed yourself at risk. (more…)

Many of us are comfortable using denial as a means of existing in society. For social proof that not everyone believes in the reality of things such as age or weight or even the true colour of their hair, look no further than many profiles on Gaydar. However, denial can become more menacing, depending on the subject matter to which it is applied. For example, consider being in denial about when you were last tested for HIV or about being diagnosed with HIV. Operating with denial in these contexts can have serious consequences that impact on your health and others. (more…)

Is being in your thirties really like being in the new twenties? Is turning forty really like turning the new thirty and so on? The whole of society seems to be reinventing what it means to be older as the baby boom generation progresses through the decades. As a gay man how do I view my older and younger peers? What expectations do I have about where someone should be or what they should have achieved by the time they are 20, 40, or 60? What scripts are we choosing to play out in 2008 and what will we play out in 2020? (more…)

Happiness is often referred to as a journey rather than a destination. For many people who have HIV being able to travel anywhere remains a very desirable activity. Before 1996 and effective HIV treatments, some newly diagnosed people (given their individual circumstances) would sell their property or other assets and begin their holiday of a lifetime. After I was diagnosed in 1993, I saved up for what I thought was to be my last big holiday in 1995. I remember savouring moments thinking ‘I’ll never pass through here again, but I’m glad I got the chance to’. Even now, many individuals regardless of whether they have health challenges, manage to prioritise and plan for lifetime dream destinations. (more…)

If you’re single on St Valentine’s Day, it’s easy to get a tad gloomy around relationships. Society often places high expectations on individuals to be in a relationship. The question, ‘Why are you not in a relationship?’ can sometimes be awkward to answer. The implication being that, if you are not in a relationship, there’s something wrong with you. Our private thoughts may quickly go through a list of reasons why not: ‘I’m not good looking enough, I’m not wealthy enough, I’m too fussy, I haven’t met the right person, the right person is with someone else, I don’t have the time, it’s all too hard for me, with HIV as well.’ (more…)

‘What the f…We are now in 2008 and I was supposed to be dead. I never planned to live this long…’ For some people living with HIV there are many mixed emotions that arise as another year passes.

Often people with HIV have re-told personal stories, such as how a well intentioned doctor gave them 5 years or less to live when they were first diagnosed with HIV. Planning for the future seemed pointless. Having sold assets, travelled the world, attended the funeral of lovers and friends, they prepared for what they believed to be their own slow, painful and inevitable demise. The scene was set for an existence of one short day to the next. (more…)