Yes, World AIDS Day was one amazing event. mOther would like to take a moment to congratulate everyone, particularly the icon and living legend Strykermeyer, who proves to be an inspiration in so many ways. We love you Stryker!

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All mOther wants for Christmas is:

A Maybelline New-York pose-able doll.
A set of really sharp stainless steel pins.
Sequin sneakers ala Converse but for a fashionably large and hefty hoof.
Drag queen trading cards… particularly the new super trim Val Nourished platinum holographic card. Aches for!
An iPod touch full of track listings from Michy T, JJ and Feminem. Ooooh, they can touch me… with their music.
Sick bags… for all those amateur nights.
VIP entry to all the clubs… oh wait – already have!

Hope you’re all feeling rich in the lead up to Christmas, cos after you’ve finished buying for me there’s a whole bunch of venues chasing your party dollar. First up, On Dec 5 is Christmas DeLuxe at Luxe Bar – part of the ticket price goes to Pride WA which is super. Go easy on the cocktails though, because…

..it’s a birthday party! Connections turns 33 this Saturday December 6 with a party that puts the mass in massive. Yes, CNC elevate the humble happening to a spiritual event as they cram the club full of shows and sounds, the latter supplied by the super hunky DJ Paul Heron who is flying in direct from the UK. Heron is masterful behind the decks. The last time he was here he set the club alight… and slept with mOther’s brother. Apparently Heron’s quite good… and not a bad DJ either. Cinnamon, Michy T and JJ jump in to lend some support while show time features Sheila, Pussy, Delta, Barbie, the supersized 6 Val Nourished, Natalya, Holly, Danny and Ben. Big? No, huge. Massive even. Enough said.

Val Nourished is back and bigger than ever! So much so that she makes a huge splash at Connections Nightclub by diving head first into a new season of Lesbian Mud Wrestling. Yes girls, hang your dignity at the door and jump in for a night of midweek madness, the likes of which will leave you more than just a little bit wet behind the ears. You can even take home some hot cash. So… now that she’s is looking so super fabulous, might Val slip into a nice little one piece to wow the crowd? We can only hope!

Golly gush … gossip! Boy 1 decided that, oh er, he felt a little green around the gills. Too much alcohol? You betcha. So Boy 1 stops snogging Boy 2 and toddles off to… impart some of his alcohol. Whoops – misses the bowl. And not just any bowl – a quite possibly out of bounds bowl at that. Boy 1 toddles back to dancefloor and resumes snogging, at no point stopping for gum, brushing his teeth or doing a spit and gargle. Which begs the question: Boy 2, are you on glue? Or do you just like the taste of spew?

Those Summer Nights return to Connections Nightclub on December 12. Enjoy the daylight savings by stepping out on to this truly chic setting and watch the sun set across the city. Glorious music made for mingling adds the perfect accompaniment to what is the perfect prelude to the weekend. Throw in the potential of ‘count the cranes’ games and this slice of heaven opens at 6pm, straight after work.

On Saturday December 13 the Groove Ryderz DJs hit The Court Hotel with all the might and excitement such a band of merry music makers can muster. DJs Jordo Marshall, DJ Woody and Pricey go back2back while Micah tops off the whole night. Tickets are $10 on the door for what promises to be a night full of party tunes.

So… this is Christmas? You bet it is! The Court Hotel and jingling the bells and bringing Santa back for another year of presents and partying and fun. Wear your best Christmas outfit down to The Court on Saturday December 20 for a night of Christmas queer… sorry, cheer. There are cocktails, carols and prizes galore. So many prizes. Loads of prizes.

Trick gets tricky Christmas Eve with special guests plus a much loved drag diva appearing alongside DJs Johnni P, Frankie Button and Joby. Yes, it’s a mad mash of Christmas cheer. Get in to Trick every Thursday night at Geisha.

Come and get your hunk on for Hunk3 at Connections this Boxing Day. Featuring DJ WayneG from London it’s time to get a little bit twisted and downright dirty. As if December couldn’t get any bigger at CNC…!

New Years Eve over at The Court Hotel sees the whole place go cabana crazy as they tip in a whole lotta sand to bring on a Beach Party! Expect palm trees, paddling pools, wave machines and the like as they splish splash and make you laugh. A veritable array of antics await. As do Kahuna Burgers, fairy floss, rides on the giant surfboards plus the chance to get some staff really wet. No, not by whispering in their ear what you’d like to do to them – by dunking them in a dunking machine! Oh, and the first 100 people get leid by the Big Kahuna. Oooooh, now I’m wet. Tickets go on sale from The Court, $30 presale and $40 at the door.

Curiouser and curiouser! Jump head first down the rabbit hole as Connections Nightclub goes all Alice in Wonderland Masquerade ball for New Years Eve. They’ll be opening up out the back with a gorgeous lawn area while cramming inside full of the fantastic freaks that only Connies seems to breed. Get ready to win a prize for being the best dressed! Tickets available from Planet and Connections.

Which belle of the ball (read ‘drag wannabe’) was out having such a laugh that she thought, ‘wait, I can be cooler – I’m gonna take something to make this night special – after all, everyone in that place that has Excelsior on the flag is doing it’ – how’s that for a cryptic clue! So off she popped… or snorted rather. Next thing you know she’s the life of the party and laughing so hard and being fantastic and wow and yes and oooooh and sparkling and so amazing yes you are and then… she shits herself. Bless! See what happens when you wanna lose a little control: your bowels do so instead. Maybe she oughta just try and have genuine fun next time? That’s if she’s capable of being genuine. Love poo work… sorry, your work!

ZOO is the bomb. It happens every Sunday at Bar Open. Yes, Strykermeyer might have left but they still have a whole host of other zookeepers ready to entertain. Recent photos depict a human birthday cake being made. Bless – we love a little live piercing, particularly of body regions that don’t normally get pierced. Freak out with the freaks that are so chic.

Now what’s your New Year’s revolutions?! Not to shit your knickers, that’s right!

Love, mOther

xoxoxoxxxx