The federal Government’s long overdue announcement that it will progressively eliminate discrimination against same-sex couples in federal legislation is to be welcomed. We will, however, still need to be vigilant in ensuring all laws around the country, federal and state, including those relating to family law, adoption and assisted reproductive technology, are reformed.
Except the Marriage Act. Rather than amending the Marriage Act, why not repeal it? We could have relationship recognition for the purposes of the benefits and responsibilities under law that currently attach to marriage. We will then be totally free to celebrate our love and commitment in any way we want to without privileging some ceremonies over others – and the same situation will apply for straight people.
After all what exactly is marriage? Given we have recognition of de facto relationships, marriage in many ways is merely a state recognised ceremony. The federal government opposed the initial ACT civil union legislation on the grounds it included a ceremony that mimicked marriage. If that is all marriage is it doesn’t really seem worth fighting for.
However, marriage is also a social institution which carries historical and cultural baggage. I am of the view it is, and always will be, an exclusionary and discriminatory institution. We give that history validity by arguing in its favour.
I fear that this pursuit of ‘gay marriage’ reflects a narrow concept of equality. An equality that is based on ‘sameness’ – that we’ll be equal if only we have access to all the same things. I believe in a substantive concept of equality that recognises and encompasses difference rather than seeking to be the ‘same’. While equality before the law is necessary it is not sufficient for genuine equality.
My other deep concern about the campaign for ‘gay marriage’ is that it buys into the rhetoric that marriage represents a more valuable relationship – tacitly acknowledging that our current relationships are inferior in some way to those of ‘married’ couples. Instead of campaigning for marriage we could be loudly proclaiming all of our relationships for what they are – special, valued, loving – instead of agreeing with those that discriminate against us that marriage is something particularly special.
The campaign for marriage is also a distraction from the more pressing issues facing LGBTI people in our society. I was frustrated that in the immediate aftermath of the federal government’s announcement the debate turned immediately to marriage, with little to no focus on the entrenched social and cultural discrimination facing the queer community. Getting access to marriage, while it may be a symbol of acceptance, will not stop violence against queer people, discrimination at work, harassment on the streets, or rejection by their own families.
I think it’s time we as a community started a conversation about what change in our interests would really look like, beyond legal reform. What would it take for there to be bigger picture cultural change that would see us valued, respected and central in society? That’s the kind of change I want.
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HAVE YOUR SAY: How important is the fight for marriage equality? How focused should we be on marriage rights?
