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Hot Potatoes! December

AT THE MOVIES (Wed Dec 26, ABC-10pm)

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Margaret Pomeranz is arguably the more trust-worthy of the two co-hosts of THE MOVIE SHOW/AT THE MOVIES for twenty years now (nothing against David Stratton- I just trust her to appreciate BLOODSUCKING PHAROAHS IN PITTSBURGH on a more down-to-Earth level than him!), and plenty of my dyke friends want to invite the alarmingly-large-earring-wearing host over for… dinner and a movie. I keep telling them that firstly, she’s cool, but married with kids and secondly, what if she only gives your performance 1.5 stars out of 5?!!

PRISON BREAK (Wed Dec 26, Seven-9:30pm)

A lot of people watch this series (which, if you can’t tell from the cunningly thought out title, concerns a bunch of prisoners who stage a break) for the beefcake value of Australian ex-pat Dominic Purcell as Lincoln. I’m not convinced – I prefer the guys I fancy to actually have the traditional neck between their head and their chest, so I’m more of a Michael (Wentworth Miller) man… although judging by rumour, I may have to fight his best friend/possible boyfriend, gay actor Luke McFarlane, for the privilege

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If convicted of the charges they face life imprisonment.

St Kilda’s Lance Collard found guilty of using gay slur for a second time

Collard is facing a monster 10 week suspension from the game.