Looking for some smile-curling comments? Want the hairs on your neck (and legs and hands and upper lip) to stand up with titillation? Want to squeal with excitement like a set of bagpipes screeching across the Scottish moors? Then you’ve come to the wrong place.
It’s Christmas. I hate Christmas. It means I have to hide all the waxing implements around my house from my relatives when they come to visit. I’m a very hairy woman you see. Very hairy. My chin looks as though I’ve been eating out and the rug got stuck. That’s why I like Brazilians. Both down there and on my plate.
Bah humbug.
Green Day have hit town for the Australian leg of their tour and wanted to party. And where better to party than at Connections Nightclub. Sounds like the lads had an outrageous time, partying hard and lapping up the Lesbian Mud Wrestling. And who knows… they might be back there this weekend.
It’s Short Cuts Volume 1 at Connections this Saturday, December 5. What’s Short Cuts? It’s a series of short shows starring the best performers around. Think the like of Jemina, Annabelle, Feminem the Future and, direct from her international tour of the Asia and the South Pacific rim with her band The Tokyo Red Eyes, The Giselle. Free entry before midnight.
Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy Birthday! This is big. So big in fact that I had hair removal surgery booked for that day and I’ve moved it back, all because of this. And let me tell you, getting an appointment with that doctor was tough. But this? It’s the 34th Birthday Spectacular at Connections Nightclub with a show featuring Jemina, Ben, Julia, Tony and Paula… oh, and The Giselle from Giselle and the Tokyo Red Eyes (yes, THAT Giselle). Gi and Fem will be baking birthday cakes while DJs Michy T and Reuben will be burning down the house. Inside at least. Outside and DJ Tim ‘Feel The Burn’ Brown will battle it out against Mad Dog ‘Get Me Some Paraffin and a Lighter… Now!’ Mandy as they race to ignite the crowd with some soaring Terrace beats. Watch the city come ablaze! If that weren’t enough, then watch out for Ash Baroque, a powder keg performer all set to explode. Big? It gets bigger with a birthday present to be unveiled at 10pm. Doors open 9pm. The dancefloor is alight until dawn. All happens? Saturday December 12!
Short Cuts Volume 2 happens at Connections on Saturday, December 19. More of the same Grade A quality munted madness, the kind that illicit, illicit random randomness. Confused? Good.
It’s Christmas time at The Court so it’s time to get your stockings stuffed on Christmas Eve. Yes, stuff them good. Stuff them real good. Yeah… sorry, thought I was back at the North Pole for a second there. DJ Santa is in town. He’ll be spinning out a sack full of tunes. There will be Christmas pizzas and Christmas cocktails too. I’m sure there will even be some Christmas cocktails of the other kind too. Ho ho ho.
Christmas gets the Glee makeover with Angels and Candy Canes oh my. Where else but Connections! The night is called A Gleeful Christmas, does mOther really need to spell it out to you? No, good.
Boxing Day at Connections is all about the boys. Outside and Ben T, Dace and Joby will be mixing it up while inside DJs Johnni P, Reuben and Brian will have the main room bopping.
New Years Eve at The Court is a Beach-fest the likes of which will get up in between your toes and down the crack of you boardies. There will be ice cream, surfboards, babes, limbo, beach games and a paddling pool. There will also be summer gifts plus the chance to win yourself the sexiest summer outfit award. Presale tickets are available now and are $30 each. Doors open 8pm until late. Oh… and there will be TRUCKLOADS of sand.
This New Years Eve The George are bringing it. And how! Get your gladiator on, it’s time to whip out the swords and throw yourself to the lions. Yes, Everything Roman hits The George this New Years. It’s $180 a ticket for general admission. But if you want to get your Cleopatra on then its $200 a ticket, which will see you make it into Cleopatra’s Lounge like an asp clinging to her boob. Tickets are all inclusive bubbles, beer, wine, selected spirits and canapés. It’s sure to be a gay old time in Rome. Find out for yourself. Doors open 8pm. Dress ups mandatory.
New Year at Connections is bigger than big. It’s a huge White Party with $1,000 up for grabs. There will be amazing electric white shows happening with the likes of Feminem, Fanta-Sea and Giselle tearing down the place. Literally. This night will be phenomenal. Keep your ears peeled and your glue glued for more details as they hit the internet.
Bah humbug,
mOther
xoxoxoxox
p.s. gift registry at Dilettante. No skimping. Thanks.
