Jay Lazarus says he was dumped as a sperm donor because he’s Jewish

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Perth man Jay Lazarus (right) has shared that a lesbian couple he’d agreed to father a child with pulled out of their agreement following the outbreak of conflict in Israel and Gaza. Lazarus says the couple broke off the agreement citing his Jewish faith and support of Israel as the reason for their decision.

The well-known Perth hairdresser shared that in October 2022 he decided to become a sperm donor and was connected with a Queensland couple.

“The process was intense, with months of medical tests and emotional counseling. Not to mention the vitamins and commitment to maintain my utmost health.” Lazarus shared on social media earlier this week.  “By September 2023, my donation was ready. I was a step closer to my wish of helping to create a family for a couple who would otherwise not be able to.”

However, after the outbreak of conflict in Israel and Gaza last year the couple sent Lazarus a message saying felt they could not move forward with their plans to have a child because they had “ethical challenges”.

Screenshots of the couple’s communication were posted online where they are shown to say, “We are about kindness and love. Everything we do, say, work towards, is love in action, for every human being. We are sad for Israeli’s, and we are sad for the Palestinian people, so deeply sad.

“We don’t have the capacity to navigate parts of your identity in this donor relationship, so we are respectfully ending this now.”

Speaking to OUTinPerth Lazarus said it took him a while to process what the couple were saying.

“It was really hurtful, and it took me a couple of weeks to get over it before I could post about it. It was a weird feeling, something that I’ve never really felt before. “

Robert Gregory, Chief Executive Officer of the Australian Jewish Association has cited the situation as an example of the growing rate of antisemitism in Australia in the wake of the conflict in Israel and Gaza.

“Whatever your thoughts on the Middle East conflict, this in an example of outright antisemitism and just a horrible way to treat someone who was acting out of kindness.

“It illustrates that much of the wave of progressive hostility towards Israel, it at its core, hostility towards Jews.

“The couple should have a long hard think about what values they plan to raise their child with.” Gregory said.

Prior to the outbreak of hostilities in Israel and Gaza, Lazarus said he’d hardly ever encountered antisemitism, and people in the local LGBTIQA+ community were usually intrigued by his faith.

‘Being Jewish and gay has never been a problem before, everyone has always found it really intriguing and had lots of questions to ask.”

But being dropped as a sperm donor because he is Jewish is just one of a number of negative incidents he’s experienced in recent months.

‘Recently when I was a pro-Israel rally my husband and I, and a friend’s mother who was standing nearby, were spat on by a guy who walked past us.” Lazarus shared. “He was arrested.” he added.

Lazarus also had the experience of seeing a man on the beach at Hillary’s Beach with a swastika painted on his back in zinc cream. The man reportedly was unaware that friends had painted the symbol on his back.

Helping a couple become parents is a dream Lazarus held for a long time.

“I’ve really always wanted to donate my sperm.” he said.

Lazarus hopes that he and husband Jeremy will be parents one day, and he felt that if you’re going to ask other people to help you become a parent, you should be willing to do that yourself too. Helping another same-sex couple become parents was his focus.

“I said to Jeremy, maybe three years ago now, when we first started dating, that I really wanted to be a sperm donor.” Lazarus said.

While the relationship with the Queensland couple didn’t work out, Lazarus has not lost his desire to help another couple become parents and he’s now matched with a couple here in Western Australia.


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