Sperm. It’s becoming a valuable commodity. So why are you wasting it needlessly on bed sheets and hot sauna action? Donate it to a worthy cause… baby-making!
Since law changes in 2004 made anonymous sperm donation a thing of the past, less and less men are handing over their swimmers in a cup, causing a spunk shortage.
Single women and lesbians wanting to have children are now resorting to hunting jism through men they know.
Would you consider giving your liquid genetics to a friend or even to a sperm bank? Would you want to be involved in the upbringing of a child you helped to make? OUTinPerth asked a selection of gay men how they feel about the issue…
‘I would certainly donate to a friend! There should be more of me on this planet. I would certainly like to meet the little one, make sure they are being raised in my image- but wouldn’t have to be involved in their upbringing. Trust would be the key, and you would be selective! I don’t think I could donate anonymously, my conscience couldn’t rest. What if he/she was raised by ferals from Balga !?’
Tragically Single, 21
‘I had no idea being asked to be a sperm donor for a lesbian couple would be so much like getting together with another man. The initial friendliness, the cautious proposition, the courteous rejection or enthusiastic acceptance, the relationship negotiation, the settling in, and even, in my case, the happily ever after.’
Happy Donor, 45
‘Drinking with my lesbian best friend she, sets down her cigarette looks me in the eye and abruptly says “Hey, if I want babies can I have your Sperm?†Drunkenly I said “Sure, no worries, but I’m not having sex with you, you know that right … you’re a woman!?†But in all honesty I WOULD NOT actually give away my spermies like a spare ciggie at connies at 3am on a Saturday night… If I did accidentally fall over with a pen in hand and scribble my signature to say “Yes, I’ll give you a cup or two of my manpoles†I would want to be involved. Someone has to teach the little one how to shop, snap their fingers with attitude and straighten their hair…’
Spooner, 22
My partner and I have committed to having a baby with a friend of ours and between us we decided that he would be the donor. We tried using the conventional method at first, he’d, eh, deposit into a jar and I would deliver the package to our friend’s house for her to insert. I must say it’s not as glamorous a process as we first imagined. Trying to work in with the correct time of the month and the right time of the day can make sex end up being a chore especially since you’ve got to remember to get the jar out to catch the sperm while in the throes of passion. After a while of trying the conventional way we recently decided to try the IVF route and we’re now going through that process. You do hear horror stories of people trying to get pregnant through IVF and it taking 10 or 11 goes which can be a little disheartening to say the least… and expensive too. We’ve also been approached by some Lesbian friends over east to consider donating sperm for them to have a child but we decided that we want to be involved in bringing up the child so declined the offer.
Daddy-To-Be, 35
‘For a friend, I’d definitely consider it. I think I already have a drunken verbal agreement with a friend that if she is still unmarried and childless by the time she’s 35 then we’d have kids. I know that she would let me be involved. I wouldn’t be comfortable with the idea that I’ve got 3 or 4 offspring running around the place that I have no idea about, didn’t know who they were and wasn’t involved with. Plus I’d want to know that my child was being taken care of by someone who I know would look after them. I think in the same way that a straight couple want to know that their partner would be a loving parent, I would be the same – even though it wasn’t a “traditional†parenting arrangement.’
Single, Sane, Searching, 26
‘I can’t think of anything worse than donating sperm, willingly or unwillingly. Part of the joy of being a male is not being around to chat the next morning, let alone be there forever such as 18 years. As a gay man, you have been delivered from the burden of being a family man- they will suction the life out of you and you will have less fun, less money and less glamour as a dad. Yes I have been asked before for this kind of contribution and I declined more than once. My affectionate advice is to cum and run!! And … Don’t fall asleep at your lesbian friend’s places and be very aware of basting equipment.’
Curmudgeon, 32
‘It’s a lot of hassle to wank in a cup. And then to have a random teenager knocking on your door 16 years later… Sounds like a story line from Will and Grace to me! If it was my own, for sure I’d want to be involved! But if some random maid had ‘turkey basted’ herself from the leftovers after an 2 day orgy in a motel in Vegas, then quite frankly, no.’
Spunky, 22
CAUTIONARY TALE
A Perth gay couple who answered a newspaper ad for a co-parent and donated sperm to a woman are now fighting for custody of the one-year-old boy conceived by home insemination with one of the men.
The men and woman had originally agreed to share custody of the child evenly and had drawn up a parenting agreement, but it was allegedly left unsigned.
The woman has since denied the men access to the child.
This leaves the men in a precarious position, as a man is not legally regarded as a parent of a child conceived through artificial insemination unless he is the woman’s husband.
If you are planning a co-parenting relationship or conversely, if you want to donate sperm but do not want to be responsible for the child’s upbringing, make sure you consult a lawyer before any exchange of bodily fluids.
SPERM BANKS- THE FACTS
– It is against the law for men to be paid for donating sperm, however most sperm banks offer some reimbursement of costs incurred by the donor.
– Sperm donation is a complex process including blood tests, sperm quality tests and counselling, to make men fully aware of the moral and ethical issues involved.
– At the time of insemination, only information which will not identify the donor is made available to the recipient.
– At the age of 16, ‘donor conceived persons’ have the right to access identifying information about the donor.
– The number of offspring for each donor is limited.
– There are no restrictions on gay men donating sperm. As long as they meet the medical criteria, gay men can donate in the same way as any other man.
– There is a serious shortage of donors in WA and healthy little swimmers are always welcome!
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