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HORROR-SCOPES #116

ARIES You will not be invited to James Franco's after-party. I will be. I shall send you photographs. You shall sit and dwell in jealously....

Horror-scopes February 2011

ARIES This month, you are not just leaving the building, you are burning it to the ground. See, you know that when God spoke unto...

Horror-Scopes January 2011

ARIES Back for more hey? Good. Looks like 2011 will be filled with all the usual malarkey someone of your caliber is sure to attract....

Horror-scopes November 2010

ARIES Life is amazing. You're amazing. Oh my god… this month you'll do something amazing and it'll be so amazing that it'll be sure to...

Horror-scopes October 2010

ARIES You are a day at the fair. You will be late this month, period. It's through no fault of your own. You can blame...

Horror-scopes August 2010

ARIES You will make some bald moves this August. Yes, follicles are out, slap heads are in. You'll lead the charge with words like...

HORROR-SCOPES, June 2010

ARIES This month your life will be a black seeping mess in the Gulf of Mexico. You will be bigger than any natural disaster: you...

Horror-scopes, May 2010

ARIES This Saturday is Kate's Party and you don't have anything to wear! Is Kate's Party fancy dress? Will Kate's Party be full of people...

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