Cough cough… cough cough. Oh dear, mOther doesn’t feel the best darlings. And having just returned from a whirlwind tour of Melbourne (otherwise known as New New Mexico) mOther thinks she might have come down with something that starts with ‘swine’ and that ends with ‘flu’. But don’t tell anyone please, although I do have some rather divine designer surgical masks I can now wear around town courtesy of Irina Bloks. Truth be told, I did try to call the Swine Flu Hotline, but all I got was crackling.
Let’s get physical… physical. Let’s get physical… I wanna hear your body talk, body talk, let me hear your body talk. Oh Olivia Newton John, I too would throw myself from a moving boat and fake my own death if it wasn’t for two ultimate truths about you. The first is Xanadu. The second are the leg warmers from THAT song. So in honour of her, Connections are holding a night called Let’s Get Physical. It’s your chance to prove your fitness levels by participating in some outright outrageous physical challenges with your chance to win a Wii Fit. This night takes place on Saturday June 6. Be there to work up a sweat.
Soho nights are taking place every second week at Ellington Jazz Club so make sure you’re there to see what happens. June 9 features Helen Matthews while June 23 is headlined by Shelly Addison. It promises to be a spectacular evening assortment so get down and check out the night.
Amateur Drag night happens every Wednesday night at The Court Hotel. It’s your chance to prove your worth and get up on stage and strut. Yes, throw caution to the wind and get ready to show the world what you are made of. Let’s hope it’s something credible!
Scene Queen happens every Friday night and seems to be taking on a slight variation each week. There will be Battle of the Sexes, Disco Fever and the Swine Flu Fever edition too. Want to find out what’s happening when? Check out the calendar in the centre of the paper and pencil in what to wear for when. See… we just pride ourselves on making our lives so inexplicably easy for you.
Looking to get a little roped and pillaged? Then why not jump down to Connections for a little bondage… Viking style. Connies is calling on buff barbarians, Scandinavian sluts orand wanton wenchs to slam on the big horned helmet and get ready to do whatever it is Vikings do. I want to say ‘aaaargh’ but that’s more pirate isn’t it? Anyway… it’s the second Shameless instalment and promises to be a night filled with naughty Nordic delights. Dressing up is highly encouraged – doors open at 9pm and there’s prizes for best dressed at midnight. What also adds to this evening are the sexual signal bracelets… or should that be sexual sigil bracelet seeing as though we’re in the land of runes. These bracelets are the perfect way to let other people know just exactly what you want… and how. Red means bugger off, amber means ‘hmmm, maybe’ and green is go, go, go. Kicks off on Saturday June 20.
Voix de la Ville is a new matinee format performance evening which promises to deliver a swathe of entertainment. Check the article below which explores in depth exactly what’s happening at this evening, so be sure to pop on those reading glasses and take a gander. But for those who want it now, Voix de la Ville takes place on Sunday June 28 from 4pm with Ostin Torre, Strykermeyer, Glamour Puss, Maybelline, Flej, Ash Baroque and others appearing on stage every hour on the hour. It takes place at The Castle.
ZOO is still happening over at Bar Open on William Street. It’s a mad affair, one populated by an assortment of the peculiar and outright strange. Doors open 8pm with antics going well into the witching hour. Get your freak on!
Horsemeat Disco is coming to town and with it comes a whole heap of madness. What exactly is Horsemeat Disco? It’s touted as an industry that deals in human happiness and is a night for club kids, fashionistas, naturists, drags, heteros, homos and ladies who like to munch. It promises to be a huge night of madness and outrageous fun and takes place at Connections on Friday July 3. Big? Better believe it.
Ok… that’s enough. mOther is actually hallucinating now so I’m sorry kids but I’ve got to crawl back into my hole and recoup a little. Until next time!
Lovelovelove
mOther
xoxoxoxoxx
