When Heath Ledger first read the script for Brokeback Mountain, he told his mate Adam Sutton that it sounded an awful lot like him. Another friend, journalist Neil McMahon, thought the stories bore an uncanny resemblance particularly given the friendship with Heath. Having convinced Adam to tell his story, the piece appeared on the front page of the Sydney Morning Herald with the headline ‘Meet Heath’s mate, the real gay cowboy’. It set a five year sales record… Two days later, ABC TV’s Australian Story program rang, and subsequently they made a documentary about Adam’s life and family. Adam has taken his story a step further, teaming up with Neil McMahon again to write Say it Out Loud: Journey of A Real Cowboy, which was released in March of this year. A second printing of the books is already planned for early next year. Zoe Carter spoke to Adam Sutton about his experiences.

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Zoe Carter: Can you tell me a little bit about ‘Say it Out Loud’?

Adam Sutton: It’s a story about my journey, my travels and what happened to me in my life and how I was able to turn it around

ZC: Did Heath Ledger give you any feedback about the book?   

AS: Yup, he read it and saw it and got back into me after it. We had to have his permission to write stuff about him. So, I rang him and he knew we were going ahead with it. After he read it, he rang me and congratulated me and said how awesome it was and how proud he was and all the rest of it….

ZC: Has your life changed dramatically since the Sydney Morning Herald article?

AS: No, not really. It’s quite funny how it’s all turned around and come back the way it was. At the moment I’m in Broome where I was 10 years ago. I drove a road train back up the highway there just the other week going from Exmouth. Funny how it’s turned full circle, and I’m back to where I started from 10 years ago in a way.

I’m in Broome because with the horse flu back over east I can’t work. I came back over here with me mate Ken who’s written about in the book. We did a big job down in Exmouth, and then just spent eight days in the Montebello Islands divin’ and fishin’ and campin’ and just fending for ourselves out in nature, which was pretty cool.

ZC: What was it like to be involved in an Australian Story doc?

AS: When I made the decision to do the first story in the paper, it was a big step to take. Neil spoke to me about it… the uncanny connection between what happened in my early life and the next minute being mates with Heath and him coming up to me and telling me about Brokeback Mountain and then on set there and just the connections between it all.  I never thought that there was anything special about the things I’ve done and all the rest of it, and Neil’s saying there’s bit of a story behind all this and I’d like to tell it. Then he said to me would you tell it, and I said “yeah, no worries.” So he put me on the Dictaphone one night and said you want me to see what I make of it? And I said yeah see what you’ve got. We took the photo of me and Archie, and it ended up on the front page of the paper. That was the Saturday and on the Monday Australian Story rang me. I didn’t think it would go any further, but it was such a great program. I thought about it, and I told Mum about it. She was a bit skeptical as it was two weeks before Sally’s wedding. We thought we’re never gonna do this and do the thing for national television, I thought you know what opportunities get put in front of you and if you turn one away, the next minute you don’t have another one. So when things land on your doorstep, it’s good to catch the ball rather than drop the ball. It was really unbelievable and a very cleansing thing to do for me and my family. What it’s done for so many other people and the feedback that we got from that episode is just incredible… mothers and fathers and grandparents and sisters and brothers and all these various types of people pouring their hearts out to me and telling me stuff. It’s been pretty amazing. After the book especially I got so much feedback and a certain amount of suicide letters come through, too. I feel responsible for those, and I also have great pleasure in now talking to these people and listening to their stories. You know when people get hurt and tell their stories they feel better, so that’s been a really amazing thing and that has been my sole purpose and drive behind it all, because some of the stuff I went through I don’t want anyone else to go through. That’s not necessary, so that has been a really powerful driving force in me to be able to tell it.   

ZC: So do you have any advice for the kids that are growing up gay in the bush now?

AS: I think the key to it is communication, talking, and sometimes its hard to find that person. They can’t beat themselves up about the way they feel – the way you feel is you, you can’t change that. It’s like whether you like steak and kidney pies or don’t like steak and kidney pies. Some people just don’t like them and it all comes down to developing your personality, developing that person – who you are and what you believe in and don’t believe in… everyone’s different and unique and we’re all entitled to those beliefs.

Say it Out Loud: Journey of a Real Cowboy is published by Random House. Adam Sutton and Neil McMahon both appeared at Pride Fairday.