Last month I caught up with my ex for dinner. Aware that she’d recently moved in with her girlfriend, I enquired about the new flat. This is when she informed me that her girlfriend was in the process of moving out. Foot suitably wedged in mouth, I began to apologise but was quickly cut off. “Oh, we’re not breaking up. We’re just winding down,” she said. Just. Winding. Down. Really? This got me to thinking about some of the oddities of the lesbian vernacular.
Over the years I have noticed several words that get more than their fair share of air time with the clitorati. Upon my first encounter I took these words at face value, as explained by the good old Macquarie dictionary. But, on closer inspection it seems some words can have subtle alternate meanings, hence their population. I’ve also uncovered a few genius expressions of late and as such would like to share with you the current contenders for ‘Sadie Spade’s Guide to the Modern Lezzy Lingo’. Here goes.
First up, ‘energy’. Expressing you share an ‘energy’ with someone other than your partner is actually a less offensive way of saying you fancy one another. I can only assume that by using the term ‘energy’ one feels negated of any wrongdoing because it somehow suggests the situation is beyond their grasp or control.
‘Connection’ is another word often used to validate inappropriate relations outside the marital unit. Granted, ‘connection’ can also denote a positive first date or a natural and seamless interaction with a new acquaintance, but readers should note that at times it’s interchangeable with “I have feelings for someone else”.
My personal favourite word with dual meaning in the lesbian vernacular is ‘engaged’. ‘Engaged’ is a handy substitute when you are trying to avoid admitting you either a) had an actual relationship with someone; or b) led someone on. A typical usage might consist of, “yes, I engaged with her but we were not together”.
‘Lily-padding’ is a relatively new addition to my lezcabulary, however, once explained it’s easy to see how incredibly useful a metaphor it is. Some lesbians have an uncanny ability to move on before they’ve even moved out. This failure to function without the adoration of another is referred to as ‘lily-padding’. Perhaps we should all just learn to swim?
And there’s your starter. All disputes, additions and queries gladly received in the suggestion box that is outinperth.com
Sadie Spade
love it! Funny huh? I feel like I must be getting old when I read about the term “engaged” used to refer to a “hook-up”, a casual relationship that lasts perhaps about the time it takes to use the public loo and flick over the “engaged” door lock! To me old fashioned as I am, “engaged” suggests you are very much in love with your partner and just waiting for marriage equality to come in so that you can formerly tie the knot in the hopes of spending your lives together!! Different uses huh? 🙂